Here's part of a 3-way email conversation I had today with Susan and Jordan. I need advice, so please let me know what you think.

Me:
Hey guys,

so this wierd thing happened to me at church yesterday and I want your opinions on it (Jordan-this was my story for you yesterday). So I usually sit by Laura Ibsen at church but yestrday she was late and didn't have a phone on her so I started looking for a seat myself. Church fills up really fast so I was looking for a spot and this guy said that he could move over and let me squeeze in. So I sit down and the guy's like my name is Mike what's your name. So I tell him my name and we make the small courtesy social talk. So the band starts playing and I'm pretty much ignoring the guy and staring away at this point as I really had nothing to say to him. He keeps talking me and then during the welcome song asks me for my phone number. He was like, I should get your number so that we can talk later this week (or something along those lines). I didn't really know what to do or say so I say "sure" and give him one of those awkward smiles that you give when you don't know what to say but want to fill up space and time.
Well, Laura finds me once service starts and I move in so that she can sit next to me. But all during service I was trying to figure out a way to not give out my number. I really couldn't come up with a good excuse or way to get out of church early or whatever. So at the end of the service he asks me for my number. Once again I say "sure" and give him my number. (BTW- sure means no, it's a simple coverup for those of us who don't like saying no to people) By this point I think I'm starting to look really frazzled but I give him my number and then take off like a rabbit to say hi to my friend Matt.
Now, is this a common occurence at church? I was thinking, or hoping, that maybe I've spent too much time in bars, schools, etc where the only time a guy asks you for your number in the first couple of minutes of meeting you is to ask you out. I was thinking maybe he's like a Mike Iverson and likes to overstretch the boundaries of typical social protocol. I don't know.
I told my friend about what happened and he said I should just screen my calls and not answer the phone. But doesn't that seem unChristian of me? Maybe this guy really just wants to be friends and that's how people do things in the world of Edina. So yeah, I need advice, does this incident seem shady to you guys?

Susan:
haha...chen that is so funny. now i wish i would have gone with you.i find it kind of akward that he asked you for your number after just talkingwith him for what, 5 mins. but then again maybe he felt sparks talking to youin those 5 mins. did he seem like a nice guy. at least out of high school?maybe he was dumbfound by your beauty and he forgot where he was and how toact? or maybe he was a mike iverson. either way, it can't hurt to talk to himand see what he wants. screening and not answering is mean. i know what itfeels like to give your number away when you dont want to and then have thatperson call you. but think of it this way. you go to that church and heprobably does to, what if he calls you this week and you screen and ignore it,and then see him next week. isn't that going to be a little more akward. eventhough i didn't want to talk to the guy from escape, i still did because ididn't want to seem mean and it be akward if i ever went back there and he wasworking.unless the guy was creepy and starts to stalk you, then thats another story.

Jordan:
Yes it seems shady to me. Extremely shady. I might not be the one toask, because I am the kind of guy who strives to NEVER be that guy whojust asks for a number within two minutes of meeting--i.e., theoverbearing guy that won't leave a poor girl alone. This might be whyI'm always single because I err too much on the other side...but Iabsolutely don't want to be that annoying guy. So I look upon peoplelike this guy with a very cynical view. Anyway, I know Chris Hill wouldagree with me when I say that guy is definitely interested in more thanjust being friends (which is ridiculous, since he just met you). CouldI be wrong? Yes. But I put it at 95% that he has a romantic interest. How to handle that? I have no idea. That's why I'm glad I'm not agirl. If he calls, which I'm sure he will, I suppose you could:1. Screen his call. And continue to avoid him. The problem with thisis that it requires lots of effort on your part...and hopefully he'llcatch the signal, but it seems like people with his very forwardpersonality often miss such signals. This would mean eventually youmight have to be blunt anyway. It might only delay the inevitable.2. Answer when he calls and bluntly tell him you're not interested inbeing more than friends. The problem is that if he really only wants tobe friends (doubtful) this will seem presumptuous of you.3. Answer the phone, he'll probably want to meet somewhere alone withyou. You can go and as he gets more and more forward, which I bet hewill, you tell him you're not interested.That's about all I can come up with. Thoughts? Let me apologize onbehalf of the morons in my gender.

Susan:
those three things that jordan said are true. you can dodge thebullet, be forward and tell him you don't want anything, or give it a whirl.but if you are not interested, don't waste your time and his. but the problemwith this is that sometimes you just aren't sure. even when you think you are,you can be wrong. maybe this guy really does just want to be friends. and inthat case. use your best judgment, do you really want to invest in him andspend time being his friend. first impressions mean a lot to me, a lot oftimes in the first few minutes you can feel things out and know if you want toget to know the person. is that the case with this dude? or were you justbeing nice? if thats the case, tell him your in your last semester and superbusy with work and class and just spending time with your other friends. he'llget the point....hopefully. jordan's right, some people are oblivious.

Jordan:
That actually sounds quite wise. Yes, it is an annoying thing to have to deal with this guy, but when put in perspective...it's not the end of the world. You can answer his call and if he freaks you out you can remove yourself from him at that point. I don't know. I suck at relationships. I think Suze makes sense.

Me:
Don't worry Jordan, I suck at relationships tooa dn I appreciate you apologizing for the male race.
Well, I'm not really sure what I'll do. I agree with Suz though that if I ever did run into this guy at church again (although I don't know if I would recognize him) it would be mean and awkward to not have returned his call. But I also know myself, if someone calls me to ask to talk and hang out and I cannot fully confirm their interest me then I will always say yes because I feel mean otherwise (like Suz said). But then you get into trouble because you run the possiblity of leading someone on. I definately have no interest in this guy, and this sounds kind of mean, but I really don't want to be his friend either. He was too talkative for me. (BTW- he's not in high school, I think he does something in printing, whatever that's suppose to mean)
So I guess the question is, does a guy get hurt more if you say yes and then tell him no face to face, or if you say no right away and just be the jerk that wants no friends?


And this is where the conversation is at. So as you can all see, I have had a very busy morning (actually I have a lot of work to do today). But I'm still unsure as to what to do, mostly because I don't want to be a jerk to people. Mean people aren't very nice or loving or Christlike. So if anyone has a really genius idea as to how I can get out of this situation, please let me know.